Malignant Reincarnation

[comradeBodko]

A dream I had a few nights ago struck me as fairly Ligottian, though without being overtly grotesque. My recollection is vague, since I typically do not remember or attempt to remember my dreams in any significant detail, but I have a distinct memory of the feelings it inspired while it was occurring.

It was the sort of dream that covered a necessarily long time-span, but didn't feel that way as I was experiencing it. I took ill and returned to living with my parents as medical costs mounted. While it didn't seem to be an especially uncommon ailment, nor one that should be life-threatening to someone my age, I eventually succumbed and died.

The disturbing aspect of the dream came at this point, since the scenario of being terminally ill did not cause me a great deal of distress as I dreamt it. Without any sort of interlude or fanfare, I was reborn as a child in a new setting, with different parents and so forth. I don't recall dreaming about "growing up," but I had an awareness that the reincarnation had occurred, and my next moment of consciousness was in elementary school. The quiet horror set in as I considered what had happened, having full knowledge of my previous life. Somehow I knew that I had no control over my decisions, and that I would make identical ones as I had previously in spite of my "new" life. I stood before a yawning eternity of forever-accumulating lifetimes, with no respite in-between, knowing that I would become more aware of my position as a bio-puppet with each rebirth.

I don't know if I'm adequately conveying the quiet, absolute dread this dream inspired, but I thought it might be of interest. I'm also curious if anyone else has had "reincarnation" dreams.