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Old 07-02-2016   #1
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Topic Nominated The stereotypical Hollywood movie thread.

Pretty simple, straight forward game. And we get to exercise our creativity too!

Name: Days of vengeance.

John Vincent Adams is a tough, no nonsense, black haired, white guy with prison tattoos and a heart of gold. Back in the day he used to be the safe-cracker and leader of The Nasty Five, a ragtag team of professional thieves who cleaned the vaults of the Los Angeles banking district in the early 2000s. Now, he's setting the score straight and cleaning his act up. He's just opened a hardware store at Small Town California to provide for his girlfriend, Conchita, and her kid from another marriage, little George, who looks up to him as the fatherly figure he obviously never had. But when former associate and small time crook, Don Vito, gets in touch to convince him to do one last, glorious, job, the offer is too good for John not to accept.

After tracking down Gomez, T-Bone and Li Wang, the reunited Nasty Five hit a casino lorded by Russian gangsters who play chess and listen to Prokofiev in between dope running and money laundering. The hit goes down smoothly, but when the gang arrives at a Motel Six to cool down, they're jumped by waiting ex-spetsnaz hitmen on the Russians’ payroll.

Left for dead, bathed in his friends’ warm blood and blamed for the death of innocent bystanders, John bludgeons one of the unsuspecting hitmen at a mom-and-pop's breakfast joint and discovers he’s been set up by Don in retribution for a long forgotten, totally irrelevant and probably silly, slide from years back. With the cops on his trail and the mob at his tail, John can only think about the coldest of dishes; revenge.

He hides for a couple of days with Conchita and George in some shack that is undetected by the police but is found by an elite Russian assassin, played by an unknown American stage actor of Latvian origin. After a bloody fight with fists, knives and shivs, while Conchita screams in spanglish and little George thinks it is all a game, John dispatches the killer just as SWAT is about to storm in, but before that happens he escapes with his Harley, totally leaving Conchita and her kid behind to answer to the police for all of his mess.

After pulling information and teeth out of Igor Ivanovich, the mob’s head enforcer, he tracks Don Vito down to a nondescript pizza parlor at the outskirts of the city. Lots of moody shots of the Los Angeles night sky a la Michael Mann follow. Vito sees John coming and escapes with his thugs, resulting on a high octane race where lots of other cars are destroyed or maimed. John squares off against Don Vito and his goons at a maquiladora to the tune of a cheesey Hans Zimmer score while the intense shootout plays out.

John kills Vito's flunkies but somehow gets knifed by the overweight and slow, obviously not as athletic, Don Vito, who grabs John's gun and proceeds to explain the plot to him. You and me, we was friends, we was like brothers!, jells Vito. Then he goes on a rant and says stuff like I loved you like a son, even though he's slightly older than John, and I made you. I made you!. Then when he is about to shoot John in the face, Vito is shot in the back by Conchita, who some way or another managed to figure out John’s whereabouts, got hold of one of the guns laying around, learned how to use it on the spot and had perfect aim without any previous training.

As Conchita and John embrace, the police arrive in helicopters. They patch him up and assure the audience that they'll take it from here. At the hospital, John manages to explain everything without involving himself, claiming to having been used by criminals who abused his god given right to provide for his family. The police take him at his word and wave away any previous criminal charges somewhere in John's thick file.

As John, Conchita and George ride out of LA, with the sun rising, Igor Ivanovich is getting a new set of teeth while The Dance of Knights is playing in the background of the private, mob run, dental clinic. All he can think of is revenge.

Fin?

Anyway, people die...
-Current 93


I am simply an accident. Why take it all so seriously?
-Emil Cioran
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Old 07-02-2016   #2
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Re: The stereotypical Hollywood movie thread.

Suddenly, a shot rang out!

"The world is indeed comic, but the joke is on mankind." - H. P. Lovecraft
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Old 07-02-2016   #3
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Re: The stereotypical Hollywood movie thread.

And then the big-breasted girl was killed. Brutally!
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Old 07-03-2016   #4
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Re: The stereotypical Hollywood movie thread.

The OP's portray of the stereotypes are so thorough that I have little left to say. Let me try though...

A brilliant genius/inventor discovers a mind-blowing code, but due to his eccentricity and madness he is ignored by colleagues and nobody believes him until the world is taken over by an evil computer. It is left for the genius to save the world, and to do so he must assemble the necessary team: the Veteran (dude knows everything about guns and weapons, hard-core survivalist), the Action girl (or the lead's romance), a little seven years old boy (placed there so the main actors can play family), and lastly the Crazy or black dude (who will die first). After many trials through mazes, flood, fire, and laser in a hospital building, the genius and his girl are the only survivors remained. They destroy the virus, and the world's restored. Unfortunately, the evil robot leaks out a Zombie virus beforehand...Part 2 incoming...

"Tell me how you want to die, and I'll tell you who you are. In other words, how do you fill out an empty life? With women, books, or worldly ambitions? No matter what you do, the starting point is boredom, and the end self-destruction. The emblem of our fate: the sky teeming with worms. Baudelaire taught me that life is the ecstasy of worms in the sun, and happiness the dance of worms."
---Tears and Saints, E. M. Cioran
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Old 07-04-2016   #5
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Re: The stereotypical Hollywood movie thread.

Karnos, you need to write this story in script form. I'm serious. You already have the pitch worked out. This story makes more sense than anything Tom Cruise or Sylvester Stallone have been in in the last 10 years. If you can keep a straight face when you pitch the story I think that you can sell this. If you can keep the Nasty Five alive you can start a franchise like the Fast and Furious movies.I'm completely serious. You might as well make some money out of this.

"A Mad World, MY Masters"
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Old 05-17-2017   #6
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Re: The stereotypical Hollywood movie thread.

Quote Originally Posted by Mr. D. View Post
Karnos, you need to write this story in script form. I'm serious. You already have the pitch worked out . . .
Karnos, I hope you are working on dialogue.
Pack it with breathless cliches, the bloody obvious, and dumbed down explanations so that those screen-goers who spend half their time texting can keep up.
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